53 YEARS OF MARRIAGE...IS IT A THING OF THE PAST?

He was a big man on campus...a tall, handsome north Louisiana Baptist, studying Agriculture at  Louisiana State University in the late '30s and early '40s.  She was a beautiful but very shy south Louisiana Catholic, studying Home Economics at the same university, during the same time period. The stories each would recount of their first meeting were vastly different! 

My dad, Doyle Chambers, was one of the few guys on campus at the time who had a car, and that made him the perfect double-date candidate for those who didn't have wheels.  My dad's friend (I'll call him Joe) decided that my dad needed to get a date so they could 'double' and dad would drive.  Doyle agreed, as long as he got a date with 'that girl over there', who was friends with Joe's girlfriend.  Doyle had had his eyes on her for the longest time, and knew that she would be the woman for him.  He was instantly smitten!

My mom, Luella  Dugas, was so shy and unsure of herself, that when Joe's girlfriend tried to fix her up with Doyle, she said, "I'm sure it's not ME that he wants to go out with.  I bet he wanted to take my roommate out."  But no, Doyle knew who he wanted to date, and it was Luella.  My mother would later tell me, "Within 5 minutes on our first date, I KNEW that this was one guy I would NEVER go out with again.  He was a north Louisiana Baptist (she was a south Louisiana Catholic...her mom would have NEVER permitted that match!!!!!), he smoked, and he drank.  That was it...he was not a candidate for her affections...

They were married on January 30, 1943, and were together until Luella's death on May 26, 1996.  They survived the hard WWII years; brought 3 children into the world; weathered childhood polio scares and inflamed tonsils and Oklahoma tornadoes and Louisiana hurricanes.  Each battled cancer several times over the years, and even painfully witnessed two of their own children have their own cancer journeys.  Life was certainly not a bed of roses...but there was never a doubt that they would get through every twist and turn,  TOGETHER. 

My Dad passed away in September 2005.  This Friday I will celebrate what would have been their 72nd wedding anniversary.  A remarkable feat!  Never a bed of roses, but a journey they walked TOGETHER.  For a lifetime.  Please watch the song I wrote to celebrate their love.  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cTFZTMMinsI&list=UUuAONW1409a_dSl9bFX6L4g 

I'm curious.  Do you think that 53 years of marriage is a thing of the past?  I don't.  Instead of letting hardship destroy them, it brought them closer together.  That's the key, I believe.  They truly married for a lifetime.  As always, thank you for reading...

until next blog post, peace and love to you

dorothy

Is it possible to S-I-M-P-L-I-F-Y CHRISTMAS?

I love family traditions.  You know, those things that just MAKE a celebration, that everybody counts on to signal a holiday.  My family had a few.  One involves a fruitcake alternative called Bishop's Bread.  I think my mom scored that recipe from a friend in Stillwater, Oklahoma, where our family lived for my first 6 years.  I've never met anyone who didn't like it!  Unbelievably good!

Another tradition involved trimming the Christmas tree. Each year, my family would add one new ornament for our tree.  Sometimes we bought it during our travels.  Sometimes my mom would make it.  After she died, I acquired a lot of her handmade ornaments, and they now adorn my own tree.  

My parents had their own tradition that started with their very first Christmas during the WWII years (due to lack of funds!).  It's a tradition that stayed with them, throughout their entire married life (53 years).  There was always a bounty of gifts for us kids.  But they were very consistent in giving each other a single present...beautifully wrapped...and quietly shared.  I think their last Christmas together, I was moved by their sharing the most.  They managed to have a quiet moment, just the two of them, in the living room, amidst opened presents and bows and 'thank yous' excitedly flying from person to person.  

Dad would buy mom a bottle of Chanel (or a teeny bottle of perfume, in their early years).  Mom would make dad a button-up shirt with a well-pressed collar (but in her last years, it was a store-bought shirt).  I love the way they made Christmas about being together, not about the material giving.  I wrote the song, Two Little Gifts, about this Christmas story, and I would be honored for you to view the video and hear the heartwarming story in more detail. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TTIL683dr8w&list=UUuAONW1409a_dSl9bFX6L4g

We're having a simple Christmas over here.  I learned how to do that from the masters.  Wishing you all a beautiful upcoming holiday season.  Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukah, Happy Holidays...

until next blog post, peace and love to you...

dorothy

Celebrating a life well-lived...Doyle Chambers (1918-2005)

He was born in 1918, the first-born child to a sharecropping family in rural Line, Arkansas.  By the time he could stand, he was picking cotton.  His family relocated to Bonita, Louisiana, because his father felt his children could receive a better education there.  He studied by kerosene lamp, and delivered his lessons in a one-room schoolhouse.  

He was by no means the perfect child!  If he got a whippin' at school, his little sister would run home to give Mom the news, and he was sent outside to 'prune the peach tree'. (He got a whippin' at home, too, with the very switch he picked.) 

He laughed as he recounted the one pair of shoes ordered from the Sears catalog yearly.  As his mom was placing the order, she would ask, "Doyle, how do your shoes feel?"  He was a kid and his response was, "Fine," and he would spend the coming year squeezing his growing feet into shoes that couldn't accommodate them.

He worked hard each day, and studied hard each night, by kerosene lamp.  He excelled in Latin, and his teacher decided that he was destined for an undergraduate degree at LSU.  Before his formal education was completed, he had received his Ph.D. in Animal Genetics from Oklahoma State University.  He would retire as Vice Chancellor for Reseach in the AgCenter at Louisiana State University.

He was an avid traveler throughout his life, crawling across Europe in the 1940s, and revisiting with his wife after his retirement in the mid-'80s.  He was a loyal and devoted  husband to my mom for 53 years (until her passing), and a consistent and loving dad to us kids.  He treasured marriage and family so much that he remarried after her passing and his family increased in size.

Grand-parenting was his specialty!  There was a gentleness about his approach to my children that warmed my heart, as he encouraged them in life with wisdoms like, "You can choose any profession.  The cream always rises to the top."  That was my dad.  His name was Doyle Chambers.  He died in September 2005. 

I wrote the tune 'So Far' after his passing.  He was very pragmatic and consistent...I am very exuberant and artsy-fartsy.  I understand now why, over the years, he would look at me and grin and shake his head at the way I looked at the world!  I always knew he loved me, though. 

If I could say one thing to my dad this very day, it would be this:  You taught me by your example how to 'stay headed in the right direction and keep it between the lines'.  I'd say that's the best gift a father can give a child.  Please take a look and listen at this slide-show video of my dad, alongside the rest of our family, over the years.  

Here's the link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkOiM0ixCdM

Special thanks to producer and videographer Daniel Lee, and to string player Dave Hinson for making this song come to life.

As always, thank you for reading, watching and listening...and a very Happy Father's Day to all the fathers and father-figures out there.  Until next blog, peace and love to you.  dorothy